Sleep 1994

Go ahead, kick off those ratty reebok hightops, loosen up that "rest in pieces" era bullet belt, crack a ice cold brewsky, twist up that doobage, thrown off that demin jacket with the deep purple patch, and let that rats nest you call a hair do just lay, you got an hour and 18 minutesto wrap your dome-piece around this gem:



I found it on this sah-wheet sleep fan myspace page

You Have to Go Pee-Pee in the Potty

This band is named after peeing your pants, which seems like a good plan to me ‘cause, I mean, honestly -- taking a piss while wearing your pants is punk-fuckin-rock. I mean, I wish I could say i peed myself more often -- i've pissed in my bed more than twice, but never full-on peed my pants.

In the 5th grade this girl pissed herself the first day of school, which was awesome in and of itself since that meant there was pee all over the floor of the class room and Mr. Bass lost his shit (holy shit was he an awful human being. But I mean, c'mon. A pissed floor? That's good times, right there.)

The other thing that was amazing about the incident was the response from the school. This girl happened to have peed on the floor of "top class" of PS 95. (I'm not tootin' my own horn. Being in the top class of a public school in the Bronx is like being the dude in Rush who gets the most ass: every other fifth grade class was filled with 25 year old juvenile delinquents)

Anyway, after she pissed herself she got demoted a class (ouch) "Oh you pissed yourself? I see. Well then you are clearly a functional retard. I think we'll give your spot in the top class to a brick, since that brick would clearly be better prepared for the level of work in this class." Basically what I’m saying is that the event was kinda awesome in its cruelty -- let's hope she didn't become a prostitute

In terms of the band, the record’s pretty decent, if dirivitive. (david yow, much?).

But it’s a pretty fun record. I mean, c'mon. The song's about ice cream rather than the usual shit of politics (born against) or drugs/molestation/AIDS/being an asshole (drunks with guns)



Speaking of Sub Pop, somebody tell that nub-guzzler Iron and Wine to go somewhere quiet and peaceful and shoot himself ...

Once You Go Black...

You know, I really wish I could just do some straight trash-talkin' right now, but I can't. Fuck, dude, does it get any better than this? That's a rhetorical question, numb-nuts, but I'll answer it anyway: no. Where to begin here? First of all, Frank Black wrote/writes the best songs of the last 20 plus years. Second of all, these are 3 of them. Third of all, how good is this?!?! And that band too -- old dudes? Longhairs? So good! I bet if you actually gave them enough weed so that they'd let you hang on the bus, you'd end up feeling like the biggest chode of all time. You'd be sitting there, eatin' Mexican food with 'em and they'd just be cracking all these awesome inside jokes that you don't get. They'd say something rad like, "Hey guy, that rip you laid on the slab last night was way on the other end of Chunesville" and then all laugh their damn faces off and you'd be sitting there not getting it so you'd laugh too (you know, just to, like, be a part of something) and they'd all stop (think: record screeching to a halt) and look at you for a sec and then go back to it shaking their heads and chuckling softly. Maybe one of them would say something like, "So weak" just to point out how much of a poseur you are. That would happen to me, at least. Anyway, it'd be fantastic.

Speaking of fantastic, when was MTV so damn good? I'm not one of these losers that's like, "This blows! There's no music! It's all reality TV!" (because I'm honest with myself) but damn son, this is some edgy shit -- sort of.

Oh, and P.S. I'm not talking about how awesome the Pixies were. They were really great and all, but here's to the one person I can think of (right now) who was better as a solo artist. Sue me. Stone me. Drown me. It's how I feel. It's called maturity -- Google it.

Anyhow, enjoy.



P.P.S. This is another one of the best songs ever written. It's on the same album as those others, but that's not the point. The point is, what's the story with that drummer's hat? Did he just get off his shift at Blades West? (That's a UWS reference. For those not in the know: Did he just get off his shift at the local snowboard/Rollerblade shop? -- ed.) Still, pretty X-Treme.



P.P.P.S. Lyle Workman

Fuck Yeah: Silkworm

Remeber when "indie rock" did not simply mean some extra skinny dude emothing like an asshole or rehasing disco in an ironic way ...

There really was a time that were some pretty decent bands who feel under that genere tag ...right? I mean I'm not crazy am i? (There was definitley a fuckload of lame ones,but..)...Yes, I know it to be true cause Silkworm was one of those bands

Happy Birthday Robbie Talihan

On this day, 28 years ago, the great stork of life landed and coughed up my dear friend and yours, Mr. Robbie Talihan. Believe me, I could wax nostalgic about the last decade and a half, but I'll spare us all and just say -- happy birthday, my brother. Here's to 28 more.

Thuston Moore Just Like to Hear Himself Talk ...

Or sing or whatever ... Remember when Thurston Moore was like the taste maker of the post--punk world (I think there was a bikini kill song about it)... He'd be like "you know what band is super-duper rad? Blank" ...and nominally employed dudes with college degrees, 2nd hand tshirts, corduroys, and glasses across the country would nod in agreement

Now i guess he's kinda bored or whatever ... and was just like "yeah ...um ...these dudes kinda sound like my old band ... good enough...digg on it"

Honestly I'm kinda "all set" with mr. moore ... the guy moved to my college town (when i was in college there) and acted like he was all boss hog (not the jon spencer side project) ... Acting all: king shit of fuck mountain ... hey fuckface you're almost 50 ...get over it ... yeah, alright, we get it you used to make love to lydia lunch or sumin and you discovered j macisis before us ... okay ... nice work ... blue ribbon plus the gold star ... go home and raise your children, hoss ...

However, for a song trying to sonic youth, I thought this was kinda decent ... p.s. i've these dudes described as noise ... i'm no enthnomusicologist but i'm pretty sure the following aint what the kids like to call noise rock